My left hand

Caveat: this may be of no interest to anyone. Unlike everything else I write, of course.

There’s something (very slightly) wrong with my left hand.

On and off for years now – the first definite memory I have of it is during a maths lesson when I was 14, but even then it was familiar – there have been short periods when my left hand feels really odd.

It’s very hard to describe, as it’s not like a sensation I’ve had anywhere else. It doesn’t hurt, it’s not too hot or cold, it’s not numb, it’s not stiff, it’s not pins and needles, and it doesn’t impair movement. It isn’t cramp or itching, although both of those words somehow get vaguely near it. It just feels wrong – throughout the hand, not just on the skin, and sometimes extending up into part of the arm. It generally lasts under an hour, sometimes much less, and I get it maybe on average once every few weeks. I’m right-handed BTW.

It really pisses me off when I get it – it can be pretty distracting and I tend to wriggle my hand around to get rid of it, which doesn’t work, but I can’t stop trying. And after a bit, it fades out.

Anyway, I’ve just had a really annoying bout of it – the second in a fortnight – and I want to let off some steam. Dunno why I’m telling you lot rather than a doctor, but I don’t think it’s remotely worth troubling a doctor with. It’s just puzzling, and occasionally irritating, but basically trivial. Much like Noel Edmonds’s career, really. If anyone can explain either…