Monday, April 14, 2008

Stayin’ alive

A perfect stranger just saved my life.

I was crossing Tottenham Court Road, wrapped up in my thoughts as great men so often are, and it somehow slipped my mind that traffic on that road goes in the same direction in both lanes. Most of the way over the first lane safely, I glanced in the other direction and of course saw nothing coming. So I was about to step out when suddenly a woman put her hand to my shoulder, stopping me as an angrily honking taxi zoomed past.

I mumbled ‘thanks’ and reeled at my stupidity. but before I could properly express my gratitude and/or hit on her, she was off.

So, on the laughable offchance that the kind, alert and really very attractive 5'9ish young woman with short blonde hair and an iPod is reading this: thank you so very much. You’re a lifesaver. Can I buy you a drink?


Anonymous said...

You should put an ad in thelondonpaper. Rubbish though it is, it probably has a higher readership than your blog. And I'm sure that if she did read your blog, she'd have asked you out already.

Also, I've always wondered whether those ads in thelondonpaper are ever successful - you could let us all know.

Matt M said...

You should bear in mind that increased adrenaline makes other people seem more attractive than they are (hence the use of horror films as date movies).

Anonymous said...

And thus hurling oneself into oncoming traffic becomes a new way to meet women. Paramedics, mostly. It’s a beautiful thing.

Anonymous said...

I'm afraid London is full of froggers (you know...fairytales and the arcade game). Well done on being saved, shame you didn't swoon? You could have assured her sticking around then.

Tom presents a nice experiment.

You could meet young med students, although, for most if you were actually injured- you risk scaring the hell out of them and bringing a devastating reality to their career choice (re: David's idea).

And Matt, is that really the reason for bringing females to horror films? Other than the odd man getting lucky and finding a kindred film spirit or something...I think I'd prefer the alcohol- middle class wino here I come! (I’m kidding- think…)

Anyway, congrats on being alive.

Matt M said...

And Matt, is that really the reason for bringing females to horror films?

So I'm led to believe.

The theory can be tested quite easily: The next time you plan to ask someone out, try jumping out at them from behind a corner or something first.

Tom Freeman said...

'Extreme blind dating'? Perhaps it could work.

And the fact of my nearly having beeen killed could actually reflect quite well on me: it sets up a subconscious contrast (here comes the bullshit, concentrate!) between me as I am and me as I'd be if I'd been hit by a speeding car.

And frankly, given that comparison, I have a really fantastic body.

Putting an ad in the paper... I wonder. On one level that sounds like the worst idea since 'Where William Hague has failed, Iain Duncan Smith shall surely succeed'. But on the other, it could be a half-decent social experiment - if only to see what random weirdos it flushes out.

Much like these comment boxes (present company excepted)...