Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Bring me the head of ‘Mr Patrick Chang’

I’ve received an email from a ‘Mr Patrick Chang’ of Hang Seng Bank Ltd, Hong Kong:

Greetings of the day to you. It is understandable that you might be a little bit apprehensive because you do not know me but I have a lucrative business proposal of mutual interest to share with you.

So far, so standard. Yet, for some reason, I read on. Towards the end it (almost sweetly) says:

Please if you are not interested delete this email and do not hunt me because I am putting my career and the life of my family at stake with this venture.

It had never occurred to me to hunt down and murder the sender of a spam email, but it’s actually not a bad idea.

So: I have a business proposal to you. If you will acquiesce to bring me the deceased head of ‘Mr Patrick Chang’, I will pay you US $100.000.000 million dollars. Please send me your bank account details and I shall wire the money to you, upon my receipt of a small handling fee necessary (US$200 dollars) to cover the costs of this transaction.

This proposal is entirely legal and acceptable and will be guaranteed to proceed without troubles.

2 comments:

TheWarmth said...

Your offer comes as quite a surprise after you describe the plea as "sweet."

Poor Patrick Chang!

Tom Freeman said...

I know, I'm fickle...

But I did check and there isn't really a Patrick Chang at Hang Seng Bank, so no actual assassinations (or legal proceedings against me for incitement to muder) are likely to happen!