Tuesday, March 23, 2010

2010 to be ‘Morse Code election’

The coming political contest is set to be fought as a Morse Code election, experts claimed yesterday.

A report commissioned by the British Society for the Promotion of Morse Code found that the number of Morse Code users is growing exponentially, after they took on a couple of work experience kids who couldn’t find proper jobs.

The claim follows earlier suggestions, mainly made on blogs, Twitter feeds and Facebook status updates, that 2010 would in fact be an ‘online election’.

However, a spokesman for the BSPMC said that Morse Code offered a unique opportunity for politicians to communicate with young voters in ways that were relevant, instant and “cool”.

But Tory attempts to capitalise on the medium came unstuck when their ‘-.-. .- ... .... / --. --- .-. -.. --- -.’ campaign was hacked to transmit ‘....- ----- ....- / . .-. .-. --- .-. / -.. --- - ... / .- -. -.. / -.. .- ... .... . ... / -. --- - / ..-. --- ..- -. -..’ instead.

And Labour’s so-called ‘M-launch’ was derailed when it emerged that former slightly relevant person Stephen Byers had been recorded claiming to have invented Morse Code for a fee of £5000. Gordon Brown’s earlier Downing Street MorCasts had to be abandoned after he somehow managed, even through the medium of dots and dashes, to appear randomly grinning like a serial killer’s dyspeptic uncle.


Hughes Views said...

Morse Code is far too efficient an encoding system for use in these days in which we all (it is alleged) aspire to ultra high speed broadband.

Semaphore, transmitted via HD+ television, would provide a use for many more of the otherwise redundant bits whizzing down our fibres or along our twisted pairs and also provide a welcome boost in employment opportunities for arts graduates.

Or bonfires on high hills...

Anonymous said...

Think I've wet myself laughing....

Anonymous said...

How about arts graduates on bonfires?