Team TF

Even an olympophobe such as me can appreciate that ‘Team GB’ appears to be doing pretty nicely out in Beijing. Like any envious git, I would like to cash in on some of this success. But, like any lazy git, I can’t be bothered to go through the years of training required to become a world-class athlete.

The solution is obvious. I will change my name by deed poll to ‘Team TF’, then sit back and wait for the gold medals, public adulation, sponsorship deals, OBE and knowledge that I am officially better than Johnny Foreigner (Team JF?) to roll in.

Excellent.